Help Make B = W

The following is a personal essay that Lucy wants to share.

The last few weeks in America have been as emotionally charged as any I can remember, even eclipsing the protests over the Vietnam War, a watershed for our generation.

What I have listened to over and over are conflicting statements especially by white men and women. While is clear to say something is wrong, it is more important to say how to fix our fractured culture.

Individuals, celebrities and their brands, companies and communities are now in a rush to play catch up as if this were the COVID 19 pandemic which seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

What is happening is unequivocally wrong. It is clear that black men, women and children in this country have been treated with separate rules under our Constitution. And while I do not condone violence what happens so often is that violence gives way to more peaceful demonstrations of passion and will, and then fosters real change.

 I believe deeply in Martin Luther King and Barack Obama and their teachings but we are still here in this same story. And I am, like so many others, part of the problem.

For me, growing up in Cambridge during the 60’s and 70’s was primarily an all white experience. I went to a progressive but nearly 98% white school. My parents were “good” liberals. I did not live in fear that my neighborhood did not belong to me or that I did not fit in. I was welcomed to eat in any restaurant, to chase Harvard boys along the Charles River and to assume that the Irish Catholic policeman on the corner would do me no harm. Claudia asked me if I had black friends growing up in Cambridge and I did not. It seems strange now to realize that I grew up in the infamous 02138 Zip Code but my experience was pretty much white.

Where do we go from here? What do middle class older white women have to offer in this crisis? What can we do to effect change?

We can give money to the right causes and every celebrity; every business has a list of worthy non profits.  

We can support black owned businesses especially those in our field of fashion and beauty.

We can refuse to buy from those businesses we deem lacking social justice.

We can read books that are directed to inform our white culture. 

We can talk to our children and grandchildren and express outrage.

We can attend rallies.

All and each of these actions are important. But here is what I am going to do.

I am going to be quiet and listen to what people of color tell us they need. This takes me back to the beginning of this post. It is important for me to understand what to say and to help others who may be woefully unprepared to express words or write sentences that advance righteousness. As the actor Mathew Perry posted on his Instagram account:”It is a privilege to learn about racism rather than experience racism.”

I am also not going to say that other causes including the environment, women’s rights, Alzheimer’s, as well as more than 25 other high profile and justifiably urgent issues, are more important than what is happening right now, right today. It is time for us to be single-minded in solving the issue of social justice and equality. Only then can we consider these others causes and crises. Imagine for a moment that COVID 19 disproportionally ravaged the white community.  It gives me pause to realize how different this pandemic would be handled.

Here are some resources and reading that may help each of us make a difference:

In the Atlantic Magazine is a terrific article about that looks at history of women behind this movement:  “The Pioneering Black Women Who Paved The Way For This Moment”       https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/06/pioneering-black-women-who-paved-way-moment/612838/     Vogue has a story of black owned businesses that we can support now:   https://www.vogue.com/article/53-black-owned-fashion-and-beauty-brands-to-support-now-and-always?utm_source=

 From ForbesWomen:

“Yelitsa Jean-Charles, the founder of Healthy Roots Dolls, recently tweeted a side-by-side photo of herself and Zoe, the doll that she created through Healthy Roots. “When little girls can’t find toys that look like them, it impacts their self-esteem,” says Jean-Charles.

These dolls are adorable and we cannot help but wonder wouldn’t it be great if there is a time in the near future when little white girls also buy these dolls and don’t see any difference?

Ciao

Lucy and Claudia